Jenna loves the new backyard. She spent the entire day there yesterday. Shes back there again today. Lounging by the pool. I joined her yesterday. But I didnt go in the water. I didnt want to expose my hideously thin body. Its not a pretty sight. I lost a lot of weight during my confinement. Basically subsisting on bread and water. Those are the only things I had. The fucking old farts ate everything else. Bunch of scavenging fucks. So glad theyre gone.

Im seriously dreading this Wednesday. My rescheduled appointment. I neglected my last one. Now shes gonna know why. Im dead. Shes gonna kill me. Its fucked up how things work. All these years when I was struggling at 118 pounds. Starving myself. Bingeing and purging. Trying to keep the weight off. Doing anything to lose a couple pounds. Now my weight is down to 95. Its so fucking insane. I cant seem to gain. Hell I cant even maintain the weight I have. Fuck!

I hear them out there. Laughing and squealing. Jenna invited her friends. Alisa and Tracy. Theyre sunbathing right now. Tracys backside is naked. Such a perfect butt. I want to go out there. Sink my teeth. Shes a gorgeous babe. I wonder if shes bi.

Ive been told I need to get laid. Both by Jenna and Perfect Girl. They say it will help me get over Kaya. Maybe theyre right. But first I need to tone my body. Gain some weight. Then maybe.