I went there today. Followed them to the park. The three of them. A family.

I watched. She looked stunning. So beautiful. It made me ached inside. I wanted to hold her. To feel her in my arms once again. Her body pressed up against mine. Tasting the sweetness of her kisses.

Originally I wanted to confront her. To confirm what I had heard. I got out of the car. Attempted to approach her. But then I saw them together. They looked so happy. I chickened out. Went back to the car. Stalked her from there.

It all makes sense. Kaya didnt go alone when Mary passed away. Tessa followed her. She spent those crucial months with her. At her side. Comforting her. Thats why Kaya was indifferent during spring break. She got what she needed from Tessa. Unbeknownst to me. Yeah it all makes sense now.

Im not angry. How could I be? Tessa provided her with what I couldnt. No thats not entirely correct. Tessa provided her with what I wouldnt. I was living within my plan. I didnt want to deviate for anyone. Not even her. But then I started missing her. Feeling the void that she left in me. So I relented. Expressed exclusivity. But it was too late. She had already chosen Tessa.

I left them there in the park. Drove back here. I didnt want to be alone. So I went to Perfect Girl. Bawled my head off. She held me. Then put me to bed. I was running a fever. But Im fine now. I think.