On campus its equal distribution. Other than Holly at lunch. I spend equal time with boys and girls. Off campus its a different story. Other than the occasional coffee with a guy friend. Most of my time is spent with girls. Males in general no longer try. Theyre resigned to the fact that Im taken. Engaged to some guy named Phil. (Hes my fictional boyfriend in Germany)

Holly thinks the same thing. That Im engaged to Phil. But she obviously thinks Im also bisexual. Otherwise she wouldnt be pursuing me. She has yet to reveal her crush. But she did kiss me two weeks ago. We were studying at her place. It was late. She let me crash. I hadnt fallen asleep yet. But my eyes were closed. She whispered my name. I pretended I didnt hear. I was waiting for her to whisper it again. But I felt her lips instead. She didnt say anything the next morning. Im glad she didnt. Shes like the perfect friend. I dont want to lose that. I dont want to lose her.

Besides she doesnt really need to say anything. With the exception of sex and making out. We practically do almost everything else that lovers do. I love the time we spend together. Laughing. Joking. Giggling hysterically. Cuddling. Holding hands. Dancing around. I always look forward to that. Its like shes already my girlfriend. Im sorry I didnt notice her before. I have so much respect for her. She lost a lot of weight. We had several classes freshmen year. Sadly I dont remember any. Probably because I ignored her. Im sure it was due to her size. I feel so stupid now. She said shes the same person. Only thinner.

We spent the day here. Huddled together in my bed. Watching movies. It was so much fun. I wish she could have spent the night. But she had dinner with relatives.