Lena was hungry. So she heated some chili in a pot. Got it all nice and hot. Sprinkled some cheese on it. Took it upstairs to eat. Halfway there she remembered her drink. She left it in the kitchen. She didnt want to carry the pot back. So she rested it on the stair railing. Went downstairs to retrieve her drink. Meanwhile the varnish on the wood railing. It melts from the heat of the hot pot. The surface becomes slick. The pot slides off. Crashes to the ground. Lena heard the noise. But didnt think anything of it. Until she returned to the stairs. Then she saw the mess. The monumental mess. There was chili everywhere. On the wall. In the carpet. On the table. All over Heathers plants. We managed to clean most of it. But the wall is damaged. We had to scrub it really hard. Now its all shiny. It doesnt match the rest of the room.

Why did I type that? I dont know. Maybe because Im hungry. I missed my dinner deadline tonight. So now I go to bed hungry. Its a new rule. No eating after 8pm. I dont want to gain any weight. I need to stay thin.

Several months ago. When Kaya was still here. When we were sleeping together. She would feel my fat roll. I would suck in my gut. The roll would go away. Id fall asleep. It would return. In the morning I would feel her hand there again. Rolling my fat between her fingers. I had enough. Thats when I started working out. Now there is no fat roll. That fat has been replaced with muscle. Im down to 106 pounds. Fit and trim. But so damn hungry.