Tough week. Nothing to do except think. Felt lonely. Cried myself to sleep every night. Thinking about Candace. Thinking about everyone. Thinking about fucked up I am. Thinking too much.

Kept waiting for the phone to ring. Hoping it was beautiful Kaya. Gave her my number. She said she would call. She didn't. Should have known better. Wanted her number. She wouldnt give it. Of course. I was a one night fuck for her. Thats what I am. Fuck Fuck Fuck! Damn she felt so good. She knew how to eat pussy. I kept coming and coming. I remember fucking her. Maybe that was a bad idea. Maybe I should have quit while I was ahead. Absence of memory. It offers no attachments. Its too late now. File it away. Another fucked up piece of my life. When did I start caring?

Dad installed the AC this morning. They didn't like the room. They said its too cramped. Too small. Yeah for five people. They brought the girls along. That was good. Dad went back to the hotel to watch golf. Mom and the girls. We went shopping. I already had what I need. It was cool though. Bought another outfit. We came back. The room was nice and cold. Relief at last. The girls are in my bed. I love them so much. Wish I didnt have to be here. Wish I could go home with them.

Why cant I ever be happy? Why cant I ever be satisfied?